Years ago I purchased one of those electro-magnetic pseudo perpetual motion machines. The instructions that came with it are really a gem. I quote them verbatim:

INSTRUCTION HOW TO USE

  1. Firstly please swing widely by hand then continuously swinging.
  2. Battery doesn't exhaust in vain when it is still because electric current can not be flowed.
  3. Dusts on surface of stand-base prevent the moving then result in stopping
  4. Don't place near to TV or Motor etc. to have magnetism which prevents moving and makes battery exhaust in vain even when still.
  5. Battery change - please open the of back side like a picture Battery to be used - 006 P (9V).

My friend Bob got these instructions with his laser pointer:

Safety Rules

  1. Never aim a laser beam at a person's eyes.
  2. Using proper safety eyewear if there is a chance that the beam or hazardous specular reflection will expose the eyes.
  3. Permitting only experienced personnel to operate the laser and not leaving an operational laser unattended if there is a chance that an unauthorized user may attept to use it.
  4. Assuring that any spectators are not potentially exposed to a hazardous condition.
  5. Not permitting tracking of non-target vehicles or aircraft if the laser is used outdoors.
  6. Assuring that individuals do not look directly into a laser beam with optical instruments unless an adequate protective filter is present within the optical train.
  7. Eliminating unnecessary specular (mirror-like) surfaces from the vicinity of the laser beam path, or avoid aiming at such surfaces.
Home Papers Paul at Rutgers Paul's Gallery